Tami Lund and Making Summer Plans

It’s that time of year. The school year is winding down, parents and children are preparing for summer.

Last week, we should have been at a seventh grade band concert. My son played trumpet, was fourth chair. He aspired to move higher, yet at the same time acknowledged the three in front of him were, “Really good.”

He should have been prepping for finals now. We would have been waiting on word from the school—what would they do with the seventh graders who were in eighth grade algebra this year? Will they teach geometry at the middle school, or will they bus the kids to the high school? I had been so proud and impressed with his math skills. Oh what he could have done with his life…

I wonder if he would have wanted to attend the eighth grade graduation? He had a few friends who were eighth graders. Would he have wanted to be part of that celebration? It would have made for a busy second week of June, because my daughter is “graduating” from elementary school, as well. There’s something going on nearly every day that week, it seems. I suppose it’s a bit easier only having to manage one kid’s schedule.

Not that I wouldn’t change that situation in a heartbeat, if given the chance.

I wonder how the summer would have gone. We were still hem-hawing over whether to leave the two kids home alone while we were at work. He was responsible enough—to a point. The biggest problem would have been the lake at the end of our road and the temptation to hang out there all day, every day. The idea makes me nervous without an adult chaperone, even if he would have been nearly fourteen years old.

Now we have to figure out summer childcare… again. It’s such an annoying process when your kids are on the verge of not needing it, yet aren’t quite there. And it’s made worse when something devastating happens and suddenly you can’t imagine ever letting your child be alone, ever, for the rest of her life. She’s all I have left, after all.

Normally, I look forward to summer with all the excitement and anticipation of a child, but this year I almost dread it. In July we are laying his ashes to rest. A few days later will be Independence Day, arguably his favorite holiday of all. Oh how that kid loved his fireworks. So much so that we had a picture of one engraved on his headstone.

A few weeks later, we will embark on our annual weeklong summer vacation, when we join my siblings and their families and my father and we all rent a place on a lake and we just… hang out. Together. My son always loved this vacation; it was one of the few times I think he was truly at peace. One of my favorite pictures of him is from last summer. He was lying in a hammock next to the lake, a can of Coke in his hand, a pleasant smile on his face. It will be strange spending that time without him. I really hope we do not all wallow in the sadness of his absence.

Creating new memories from traditional moments is the hardest thing of all, I think. Entirely new experiences are easy; there is nothing to base anything on, nothing to do but enjoy it. A few weekends ago, my new, smaller family unit took an impromptu trip to Florida.

(Note to Midwesterners: May is the time to go to Florida. Plane tickets are crazy cheap.)

It wasn’t until we returned home to Detroit that I realized I had hardly thought of him at all that weekend, and I hadn’t cried once. That’s because there were no reminders, nothing to associate with him. Everything was about the three of us, discovering a new vacation spot, carving brand new memories.

Of course that all changed the moment we pulled into the driveway and I saw the wind chimes we had been given as a memorial gift, his bike on the back porch. I walked inside and the first thing I noticed were all the pictures. His closed bedroom door at the end of the hall. The kitchen, the living room, the basement—it’s all the same. None of it has changed since he changed my life so explicitly ten weeks ago.

And yet, everything is different.

I had a momentary urge to go through the house and collect all the pictures, all the mementos, and store them away somewhere. Just so I would not be reminded every moment of every day. It had been so refreshing, for those few precious days we were in Florida, to not have him, what he did, control my life, my emotions, my actions.

Although, in truth, what happened did control my actions when we booked that trip. We never would have randomly flown to Florida with two weeks’ notice if our family had still been intact. There would have undoubtedly been something going on, and besides, we wouldn’t have been able to afford it, even with ridiculously cheap airfare. It would never have occurred to us. Oh how life has changed.

So I didn’t put the pictures away. I left the mementos hanging on the wall, sitting on my windowsill. And I sat outside on the porch and listened to the wind chimes, gently tinkling in the breeze. And yes, I wished things were different. I do that every day, a thousand times a day.

And then, when my wine glass was empty, I stood up and went inside and started dinner.

Because time marches on, and for the living, so does life.

Tami Lund Headshot 2014

Tami Lund is an author, wine drinker, and is using blogging as therapy while trying to figure out how to live life after the tragic death of her teenage son. When she isn’t doing that, she’s writing happily ever afters, which can be found on her website, www.tamilund.com.


Food Disasters with Sara Daniel

SaraDaniel_headshot_9-2012_cropped - smallIf my life were a reality show, Food Disasters would be the title. My specialty is making things go wrong. Generally, I screw up the usual things—leaving garlic bread in the oven until it’s black, forgetting a pan of milk on the stove until it turns a weird yellow color and the bottom of the pan is beyond cleaning, leaving eggs boiling for so long that all the water dries up. Most of those oops moments happen because I’m writing or editing or setting up (ah-hem) blog posts. I lose track of time and forget I have something going on in the kitchen.

But not all my disasters end up charred. A couple months ago, I thought I had a lovely dish of salmon cooking in the oven. When I went to take it out, I discovered I had a lovely dish of raw salmon sitting  on the counter. This, of course, happened on a day when we needed to eat and run off to evening activities.

I can even manage to mess up my favorites. You can read here about my adventures in accidentally substituting watermelon-flavored candies instead of peppermints on candy cane cookies one unforgettable Christmas.

A month ago, I took my food disaster ability to a new level. We were having a party—big enough where we had to rent a room in a public building. We could bring food in, but there were no kitchen facilities available. Folks, I was insanely organized. I scooped out the stores. I made spreadsheets and pages of plans. I checked out serving amounts and made sure I had enough food for 100 people. I certainly did. I had so much that I overflowed my aluminum trays.

SaraDaniel_TheBadBoysGift_200Let me tell you, Italian beef smells really good the day you spill it in your minivan. It doesn’t even smell too bad the next morning. But then the car sits out in the hot sun, and that delicious gravy seeps through the carpeting in your trunk and settles in for the long, smelly haul.

After a month, two rounds of steam cleaning, an extra-large box of baking soda, a jug of vinegar, and “fresh linen” scented vent-clips haven’t made a dent in the nasty smell. I pleaded on Facebook for ideas. The only one I haven’t tried is the suggestion to trade the car in.  I’m headed out in a few minutes to try a third round of steam cleaning, and after that, I believe the next plan might be to embrace the stench, love the stench.

In happier news, The Bad Boy’s Gift is still free on all e-retailers. Pick up your copy today and enjoy. Hopefully, the bad boy’s gift to me will be a new Italian-beef-free car. Hey, a girl’s got to have her fantasies!!

Buy Links:
All Romance eBooks
Google Play
Barnes & Noble
Want a bad boy 2


New Release by Emilia Mancini

Yes, I know. It’s about damn time I had a new release with Emilia Mancini on it rather than that pesky sweet contemporary side of me. This isn’t exactly a new release, but close enough we’re going with that. Eyes of the Wolf was part of an anthology, but now I’m releasing it as a short story, so, yup, we’re going with new release.


And I know just what you want…


Private detective Jake McDonnell has been hired to make sure Maria Rodriguez isn’t involved in illegal activities. He’s certain she’s on the up and up until he catches her heading to the seedier side of town. He follows, curious why she’d be walking into a dimly lit warehouse. What he discovers will leave his senses reeling and his body aching.

eyes of the wolf_coverAnd your R-rated Excerpt for Eyes of the Wolf:

As much as I didn’t want to believe Maria was involved in illegal activities, good, honest people didn’t hang out in the warehouse district on Friday night.

I sat in the car watching her walk through what could easily pass as the worst part of town to a door that didn’t even have proper hinges or a knob. She knocked. The thin piece of metal scraped the ground as it opened. She spoke to a man in a suit and tie, then disappeared inside.

I tapped my fingers on the steering wheel debating. She’d tell her mother to fire me if I tried to follow her. But, hell, I’d be out of a job anyway if she were murdered by gang members. Driving into the shadows, I parked and rushed to the door.

The metal sheet scraped open at the sound of my knock and a man looked me over. “Password?”


“Uh,” I stuttered out. “I don’t…I don’t know.”

He jerked his head toward the darkness behind me, silently telling me to get lost.

I pulled my wallet out, and he chuckled. “You don’t have enough in there to get by me. Get outta here.”

As the door closed, I tried to get a glimpse inside but the only thing I could see was black cloth blocking the view inside the warehouse.


Maria was safe. At least I knew that. She was inside a secure building with a guy the size of a sumo wrestler blocking the door. Nobody was getting in that shouldn’t. That was only mildly comforting considering I had no idea who could get in.

Now that I knew she was in a secure location, I told myself to return to the car and wait for her. But if I didn’t have a clear report for Mrs. Rodriguez on what her daughter was up to—especially now that I had my doubts about Maria’s actions—I had a feeling the woman would have my balls in a jar.

Stuffing my hands in my pockets, I walked away casually, but the moment I neared the corner of the building, I glanced back. No one was in sight, so I rounded into the dark-as-fuck alley and pulled my keys from the pocket. The flashlight attached to my keyring was small, but efficient enough to keep me from tripping over discarded bottles and cans. I flashed the light over the side of the building as I went. Not a single damned window.

I was about to give up when a door farther down the alley opened. A guy came stumbling out and lit a cigarette. The lighter illuminated the mask covering the top half of his face. I was thrown for a moment, not expecting that, but then a woman came out of the door and threw herself at his back. She didn’t close the door behind her, letting light stream into the dimly lit passage.

I stood, motionless, not wanting to get caught. As I watched, the woman—also wearing a mask that hid the top of her face—pushed the man to the wall and dropped to her knees in front of him.

Holy shit.

His pants were down in a flash, and his cock was in her mouth even faster. He stuck on hand into her hair as he smoked with the other. After a few moments, he tossed the cigarette aside and used both hands to hold her head as he fucked her mouth. He pumped in and out so hard I was afraid he was going to hurt the woman, but she didn’t seem to mind. When he started to pull away, she gripped his hips and drove his prick down her throat again.

Sweet Jesus, I can’t remember the last time I got a blowjob like that. My dick twitched in my pants, reminding me that it’d been far too long.

The next time he pulled from the woman, she let him, but only because he yanked her to her feet, shoved her against the wall, and pushed her skirt up. The light streaming out of the open door revealed that the woman wasn’t wearing panties. The man gripped her hips, much like she’d done to him, and rammed himself inside her without so much as a gentle nudge. She grunted, groaned, moaned, and he pounded and called her whore, bitch, and a few other unflattering terms that she seemed to be getting off on.

I debated, only a moment longer, before easing toward them. While they were distracted with their dark-alley mating ritual, I slipped inside the open door to a room where masked people were preparing food. I couldn’t call it a kitchen because it wasn’t one. There were tables—prep stations—but not a kitchen. And the people there weren’t cooks. They were putting premade finger foods on trays and opening bottles of booze, refilling glasses, and hurriedly filing in and out of the room.

“Sir,” someone called with a thick accent that I couldn’t place.

My heart skipped a few beats. Busted.

I turned to face him. He, too, was wearing a mask. What the fuck? He waved his hand in front of his face, but he didn’t look at me. I didn’t understand what he meant until he glanced up, then quickly looked away again.

“You’re not supposed to take your mask off, sir.”

Oh. “I, uh… The string broke. I tried to fix it, but…”

He nodded toward the corner. “Take one of ours. We have extras.”

Even the waitstaff wore masks? I snagged one from the pile. It wasn’t nearly as extravagant as the couple in the alley, but it was apparently enough. I slid the cheap plastic mold on and nodded my thanks before walking by the tables. I followed a masked waitress out and stopped in my tracks.

Well-dressed women and men, some in suits like Ms. Rodriguez had been, others in evening gowns and tuxes, and some in more casual attire like the two in the alley, were mingling. All were in masks, all drinking, eating finger foods, and acting as casual and comfortable.

That wasn’t what shocked me. What shocked me was that intermingling with the well-dressed and masked partygoers were naked men and woman, some standing around talking, some being fondled, some outright fucking on tables and chairs and against walls. And no one seemed to be bothered in the least.

Buy here!

And sometimes Holley writes sci-fi romance.

Deep Space Banner

©Nikki Zalewski – Adobe Stock

I have a secret identity. Sort of.

I mean, it’s not really a secret so much as…obscure right now. It’ll be less obscure in the next month or so. I hope.

I spun off the pen name H.E. Trent because sometimes I want to write books that don’t fit my established style and tone. Also, sometimes I want to write books that don’t have an  established percentage of romantic content in them. Sometimes, I need there be as much pain and suffering as there is love.


Starting in August, I’m rolling out a new series called The Jekh Saga. It’s set in the near-future on a colony of Earth called Jekh…and suffice it to say, all isn’t well. Space is the new [corporate] Wild West, and it’s dog-eat-dog on the frontier.

The series is a little more political than my typical fare, a little darker, and a little more episodic. So, while each [long] book will contain a full romance, it’ll also have a bunch of other stuff happening that won’t necessarily resolve quickly. The first three books will all be out by December, because I know how infuriating having to wait for series installments is.

Sorry to be vague! In the coming weeks, though, I’ll be telling you more about Jekh and the headstrong, meddling McGarry siblings who end up there. I’m excited to be heading in a newer, more noir direction, and I hope a few of you hop on for the ride!

(And don’t worry – I’ll still have plenty of Holley stories coming out, too. After all, variety is the spice of life.)

Celebrating My Birthday

Birthday-Cake-Pictures-with-Candles-500x428I’m celebrating my birthday all this week…and even got in a few days last week.

Why? Because if I don’t celebrate it, no one will.

I’ve had enough birthdays to create a bonfire atop any cake which means I’ve learned a few things.

  1. If I make a big deal about the number of years I’ve stayed alive on this earth, so will everyone around me.
  2. People like to celebrate the birthdays of others. I will always be thankful all my family got together to celebrate my parents’ 80th birthdays. (They were only a few weeks apart.)  We lost my Mom before she saw her 81st.
  3. We’re taught from day we reach that magical 1 year that birthdays are a good reason to have a party….and the bigger the number, the bigger the party.
  4. bday giftsBirthdays usually mean presents and who doesn’t like free stuff?
  5. I’ve also learned it’s much better to ask for what you really want. Left to the imagination of others, you’d be surprised (and not in a good way) what some people will buy you for your birthday.
  6. At some point, your own birthday means less to you that it once did. I’ve actually forgotten it was my birthday or how many years old I was. That happened when I was more concerned about keeping my children alive and celebrating each year that I didn’t break them. (I’m still looking for that damned instruction book they supposedly came with!)
  7. At some point in your life, you will lie about your age. When I was 14 I had an ID that claimed I was 18, the drinking age in NY at the time. I actually looked older at 14 than I did at 20. (Bet you thought I was talking about the other end of that timeline!)
  8. I’ve never had a surprise party but I’ve hosted plenty of them. Now would not be a good time to throw me one, though. I’d either croak from a heart attack or start shooting people. (Uh, gun girl here.)
  9. You’re never too old to start a new career. I was over fifty before I read my first romance novel and wrote my first one at fifty-five. I have career goals for sixty that I intend to meet in the next year!
  10. The larger the number, the more parts of your body fall apart. Thus my hip replacement scheduled for July. But I’ve decided I “earned” that new hip. I started roller skating at three years old, skiing at about eight years old, horseback riding at ten, modern dance classes in high school, Navy PT in college,  and taught aerobics for years, high impact my favorite. I guarantee I’ve fallen on my ass more times than I could ever remember, sprained that ankle at least once a year and tore up the knee on that side several years ago.

I’ve lived my life. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not about to stop living life to the fullest possible. (Did you catch that last qualifier?)

Now I want to hear about a memorable birthday in your life. 

One last thing I’ve learned, it’s just as nice to give at your birthday as it is to receive…so I’ve put my books on sale!

Sale banner layers copy



Craving with USA-Today Best-seller, Helen Hardt

These days, it can be hard to know what to read. There are so many books out there, millions published every year, and discovering new favorites takes time and energy. Reader events, Goodreads, blogs, the best-seller lists–these are places I go to read long excerpt, reviews, and really get to know an author’s style and genre before I one-click myself through an entire series, or before I fill my bag with paperbacks (and the occasional hardcover!)

I was in a fantastic bookstore the other day in the Los Angeles-area called The Ripped Bodice.  The store is dedicated to romance–so many genres, so many authors. Whether indie-pubbed or traditionally published, I loved exploring new authors and of course finding some of my favorites, like Helen Hardt.


The Ripped Bodice, Culver City, California

And wouldn’t you know it… Helen’s latest release, Craving, Book 1 in the Steel Brothers Saga, hit the USA Today Best-seller list.  Not surprising! Helen’s hot heroes and passionate heroines are… well, check just some of her reviews out:


“Hardt delivers a brand-new series with rugged cowboys and scintillating sex. Talon and Jade’s instant chemistry heats up the pages…”
-~RT Book Reviews
“This book is so raw and addictive! Hands down my new favorite series this year.”
-~ Meredith Wild, #1 New York Times Bestselling Author
“Ms. Hardt weaves magic with her keyboard and what remains is a beautifully written first installment about two people who are broken but not destroyed… How Hardt weaves the past with the present, while keeping the reader guessing about the secrets the brothers barricade from others, is flawless.”
-~Heroes & Heartbreakers


Enjoy an exclusive excerpt from Craving here: Excerpt from Helen Hardt’s Craving, Book 1 Steel Brothers


After being left at the altar, Jade Roberts seeks solace at her best friend’s ranch on the Colorado western slope. Her humiliation still ripe, she doesn’t expect to be attracted to her friend’s reticent brother, but when the gorgeous cowboy kisses her, all bets are off.

Talon Steel is broken. Having never fully healed from a horrific childhood trauma, he simply exists, taking from women what is offered and giving nothing in return…until Jade Roberts catapults into his life. She is beautiful, sweet, and giving, and his desire for her becomes a craving he fears he’ll never be able to satisfy.

Passion sizzles between the two lovers…but long-buried secrets haunt them both and may eventually tear them apart.


craving cover


Craving buy links:
Helen Hardt
Please join me in congratulating Helen on hitting the USA-Today best-seller list! And then excuse me, I’ve got some reading to finish…

Things I Probably Shouldn’t Say by Lynn Lorenz

I’m too tired for this. Most days I give no fucks.

Ten years ago, no one knew anything about authors. Maybe if you were big enough, you went on a morning news show. But readers contact you? Nope. Much less every day, or once a week, or have an email you could write to, or a FB author page you could ask questions on. It was sort of nice, I think, having that privacy, that anonymity.

Nowadays, we expect authors to be at our beck and call – doing the promo wild thang – making sure readers knew us, our cats/dogs/kids, and could chat about our upcoming books and the hot guys from the last book, and not just on promo loops or FB party days, but All The Time.
writer distracted by internet

And that’s fine – for those of us who want to do that. I’m out there, and frankly before FB, I had much more interaction that mattered through email. I’m not talking about likes, or reactions on posts that most of my friends don’t ever see. I mean the fan/reader emails about my books. I had tons of reviews, most of which have been deleted from Amazon recently. I have hundreds of those love letters saved, but around 2-3 yrs ago, they sort of dried up. As FB rose in prominence as the way to contact authors, emails (for me) waned. I still get a few, but not like I did from 2008-20012 or so. And I loved getting them. So much I saved them.
got mail

Mostly because there were only a few writers who wrote gay romance. People got to know us by email. And we knew each other, because the writing community was so small. Not so much now. You might think it’s small, but trust me, there are dozens and dozens of authors whose names I don’t know, have never heard of them or they heard of me. It’s like it reached critical mass and exploded. And that’s okay. Don’t we say, there’s room for all of us?

Look, just because an author doesn’t want to maintain a place where readers have instant access to them, and believe me, FB and promo eat up a huge amount of our time, is no reason to think something nefarious is going on. It might be. But then again, it probably isn’t. A lot of writers are not social creatures. A lot of interaction really bothers them – they shut down, turn off, and for some it fucks with their creativity and writing.

My way of dealing with the push and pull of “promo/put myself out there,” is that I’m thinking of hiring a PA just to deal with some promo/contests/etc, because I’m swamped with it and have little time to actually write. (anyone have a suggestion for someone who wants to intern for no/little money, let me know.)

I’m here for the writing. The stories. The characters and their heartbreaks. Their HEA. And I do love to talk to readers. I could talk for days about books and romance and how and why I write.

But if someone, or several someones, decide to write the books with a team of people to help them, so what? It’s one way. Personally, I could never give up control of my books. Ever. That’s why I don’t write with a partner. It’s mine! Gimme! Don’t touch the precious!

When I was writing like a dynamo, I was doing a novella a month, a novel in three months, but it was with publishers, and subject to their control of edits, formatting and publication. I wrote 40 books from 2008-2015, but I had at least 8 more books sitting in files that I haven’t even touched. I’ve self pubbed a few books, and let me tell you, if you’ve got that book written and edited, it takes little to format and upload. But it does take time. Cover art can be done in a few days. And that takes money. So, time and money.

That being said, if a group of people decide to work together to put out a book out under one name, I don’t care. But readers might, especially if they find the writing is inconsistent or there is shoddy editing. They might complain, but they have the right not to buy any more of those books. No one is forcing them to buy. There is Amazon Sample, after all. Just sample it, if it’s not up to par, don’t buy it. Personally, I never buy books without sampling and it’s saved me a ton of money. (This excludes my very small list of authors I’d buy sample unseen.)

You might not know it, but a lot of big name writers in mainstream fiction write a first draft and then turn it over to their publisher, who has it edited, and fleshed out. It’s a thing. So, to me, it sounds like a writer created her own personal publishing company, each person takes a different role, she writes, someone edits, someone may flesh it out, a formatter, a cover artist, etc. Voila, book!

And if several writers did this, then there would be enough books to churn out every week for quite a while. So they could take advantage of the Amz analytics to create best sellers. So these people are smart, they’re using the system, which everyone knows about, to win. They’re using the price point and KU, and Amazon first to “capture the market” so to speak.

How they split the money is another thing, and totally up to them.FB_IMG_1446351213291

And I understand with all the recent to-do with author identity, plagiarism, etc. going on in our community, some are quick to wonder and speculate. I get it. We’re all gun-shy, sitting on the edge of our seats, waiting for the next shoe to drop.
But is this deceiving anyone? Not really. Did you really need to know there were several persons writing the books or one person with several helping? Not really. This has been going on in the publishing industry for ages.

Is this because they’re hitting the bestselling lists? Probably. Are they gaming the system? Not really. Are they going to stay on top forever? Probably not. Does it mean they’re plagiarizing? Probably not. Does it mean they’re converting m/f to m/m? Probably not.

So maybe we should stop waving our arms, clutching our pearls, and just let it go.
let it go No author owes readers interaction. We never did before, and we still don’t. Interaction is the writer’s prerogative.

Frankly, I’d rather have people email me or post on FB about their experience reading one of my books, good or bad. That they posted a review cuz they loved it so much. That’s what means the most to me. I’ve been a bestseller. I’ve had books bomb. I’ve had months of fantastic sales, and months where I couldn’t buy a Starbucks Vanilla Bean Frappuccino and I love those suckers. It’s knowing someone liked me, they liked me! that means the most.

I’m here for the long haul. Have been since 2008. I’ll ride the ups and downs, the “who are you” and “What do you write?” and the “I’ve never read one of your books” and the “OMG! It’s Lynn Lorenz!” moments. The collapse of a few publishers and the mad dash to get those books back out there. The loss of half my backlist and my income, until it is re-issued or I get around to self-pubbing them.

I might be a “has been,” or not the flavor of the day, or not the name on everyone’s lips or have people begging to review my books, but I’ll hold my body of work up against anyone’s. I consider myself one of the old timers, and I’ll keep writing. It won’t be as fast or prolific as it once was, but it’ll be out there.

In the meantime, please, remember authors are people too, and have lives, and can’t always interact and write at the same time, like walking and chewing gum. And if they get creative in publishing, or write dino-sex books, or whatever, to get their names out there and make some money, that’s okay too.

I wish people would get over this idea that making money by writing is a bad thing. It’s a good thing, it’s a tangible reward for doing something right. It’s how we get paid, folks. Making money is necessary. If we didn’t make money, we’d probably have to stop writing and get a second job. That was my position all those years ago. I wanted to tell stories, but I needed more income, without going to a horrible part time job. I was fortunate that people loved my books.

Its bad enough our books are stolen by people who claim to love our books, either by piracy or read and return. Let’s hope Amazon will stop that practice, or at least clamp down on offenders.

The attitude, of “they’re in it for the money” is like, to me, yeah, what’s your point? Yes. I write to earn money. What about it? I also write for other reasons, all good. Reason like here’s a cool story and love is love and everyone deserves a happily ever after. Can’t I write for all those things?

Damn, this went on freaking forever.

One more thing. Let’s be kind to each other.