Cheesy Sex

ID-10010900When you think of sexy food I bet the things that come to mind are sweet and sensual. Who can resist licking a warm body drizzled in chocolate sauce? Or how about filling a belly button with champagne and dipping sweet strawberries in it?  Sucking honey from hard flesh?

My other half is not a sweet tooth. He loves bags of potato chips, nuts, corn chips and cheese. Would you ever imagine taking any of these to bed. Can you imagine how uncomfortable a night’s slumber would by lying on a sheet covered in chip crumbs? And nuts could get into all the wrong places. What about cheese?

Cream cheese is a possibility but I can definitely advise that grated parmesan is not good. Now you might think I was testing something for a new book, or just going one kinky step further to please my hubby. You’d be wrong on both counts. Nope, I opened the fridge to tug out a bottle of Coke Zero to quench my thirst in Australia’s never ending heat wave and a full tub of grated parmesan toppled off my shelf. The lid popped off and the whole tub landed on my chest. My cleavage was full of cheese, my bra was full of cheese and it felt horrible. I smelt of sweaty feet and I hate cheese, it makes me heave.

Grated parmesan makes your skin itch, it gets everywhere and only a shower will clean up the mess. So, no matter how much your partner begs you to take the grater to bed, trust me and just don’t go there.

Photo Suat Eman

7 thoughts on “Cheesy Sex

  1. WAHAHAHAHAHA! Poor girl – but you gave me images of your hubs wanting to get a jar of spaghetti sauce and…nevermind. 🙂 And how can you not like cheese?! (okay, I get the smelly feet thing, but’s CHEEEEEEESE!)


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